Social pressure about important decisions. Students comparing their college process to others. Trying to focus on enjoying the high school experience and not planning too far ahead. College preparation can be highly stressful for many, and there are sometimes conflicting opinions on the right versus wrong thing to do. The right time to start preparing can be different depending on the person, and a variety of factors can influence each student’s individual experience.
Gigi Johnson ‘27 has had a long journey with college preparation, starting from when she was in middle school. Throughout eighth grade and approaching freshman year, she planned out the classes she should take and the activities she should participate in. She also met regularly with a counselor outside of school to help ease her stress and anxiety about the college process.
Johnson acknowledges that there is an increasing social pressure to start preparing for college earlier and that starting the process at a younger age has become the cultural norm.
“I feel like in the past couple of years, there’s been encouragement to start the college process sooner,” Johnson said. “That freaked me out and added to my anxiety of wanting to be prepared and do everything that I can.”
As someone who regularly follows high schoolers throughout the college process, college counselor Elisa Sagardia recognizes the impact of student opinions on classmates’ views of their own college journey. In her 20 years of experience, Sagardia has noticed that students’ decision making has started to rely less on their own intuition and more on the opinions of their friends and peers.
“So much is just based around other people’s thoughts,” Sagardia said. “We need to take that part out of it for students, especially in ninth and 10th grade, and tell them to make decisions based on what is going to increase their happiness and their engagement in high school. They’re going to have a story to tell, and they’re going to have purpose and reason behind the things that they did. When it is a formula from somebody else, they won’t be able to explain why they did it.”
Devon Hoque ‘29 noticed a difference in students’ attitudes about college from middle school to high school, recognizing an increase in social influence to start worrying more about grades and activities. As a freshman, Hoque feels that there was a huge transition in his classmates’ mindsets as well as his own to focusing more on college preparation, although he believes that everyone should move at their own pace and that everyone’s process should be individual to them.
“I feel like there’s a misconception that there is a right time and a wrong time to start focusing on college,” Hoque said. “I work well with overloading myself, and I do well with challenges—meeting a certain standard that I set as my goal. For some of my classmates, that is completely different, so I think it’s unrealistic for there to be the expectation that everyone has to do a set number of steps and follow a certain process just to get into a ‘good’ college.”
While Johnson struggles with not comparing herself to others, she realizes the harm it can have on students, especially during the college preparation period. She finds it difficult in general to block out what others think, but it is even worse around the topic of college because so many people have different opinions on what is right and wrong. Despite this, she continues to work towards focusing on her own individual process and keeping in mind that her path is different from everyone else.
“I feel like comparing yourself to people, especially throughout the college process, is almost inevitable,” Johnson said. “I do it all the time, but something I’ve had to learn is that the college process is very specific to each individual. I still get stressed and compare myself to my peers about what they’re doing, although my college counselor reassures me that it’s very personal and so I can’t compare my journey to what someone else’s journey looks like because there are tons of different factors. People want to go to thousands of different colleges, and that influences a lot of what people’s process looks like.”
Sagardia stresses to her students the importance of making choices that aren’t just for college, but also connect to their interests. She finds that students who try new activities and discover what they like along the way are set up for the most success. Instead of following a list of what will look the best for college, Sagardia believes that when students pursue their passions they will get the most out of their limited time in high school.
“By the time a student applies to college, admissions officers are looking at their overall story, how that applicant engaged in their high school experience and why they did the things that they did,” Sagardia said. “The student who decides that they’re going to do everything for college is going to really miss out on the journey that this can be. They’re cheating themselves out of an experience that’s part of our lives—learning about ourselves. In the end, they need to prioritize their happiness. That’s the number one thing.”
